How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
