btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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