Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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