dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Soap is not a condiment
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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