Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize