so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize