Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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