maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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