Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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