I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
