I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
My life is pants optional.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
