I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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