Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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