I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
this hospital has no fireball
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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