I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize