Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
