I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
