Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
