I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
