So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
