I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I just found puke in my bra..
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
