Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
