She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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