too bad you live with your parents still
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
