Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
How naked do you want me to be?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
