Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
