i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
