so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I think I won the penis lottery.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
