thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I'm at about main and main street
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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