O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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