Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
