Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
