Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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