guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize