I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
