Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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