Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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