in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
