and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize