When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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