Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
