So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Acid is not a monday night drug
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
3pm strippers are depressing
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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