he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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