Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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