Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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