You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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