I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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