new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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