The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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