Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize