Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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